I have been in (more of) a worry state the last few days. My contractions have increased again. Yesterday and the day before I have had to taken 5 STAT doses of Nifedipine to control them. These doses make me groggy and stupid and I worry about subjecting (more of) the medicine to the little fellah. He is just a wee little thing.

I just made an Excel spreadsheet of the highlights of my contraction adventures in bed rest. I know, exciting. It helped me to visualize better what the patterns are so I can go over it with my doctor. She will call to check in with me when she gets out of delivery.

Some of the reason why I want to check in (in addition to the concern that my belly almost seems to have gone into an almost constant “firm” state) is that I have been noticing some new sensations. Billy and I think that it is probably because of my enlarging belly. It seems to all of the sudden become bigger out of seemingly nowhere. It is getting large, folks!

My sense is that everything will be “okay” but I was told to check in with concerns.

Being “stuck” on bed rest and having to monitor my contractions and other sensations is making me slightly crazy with worry. I keep reaffirming that I am committed to carrying this baby until the first week of August.

The mind is a powerful thing. I aim to trust that.